Monday, December 2, 2013


Why is sex a dirty word with christians? ? I am a life long Christian and have often asked that question.   Sex provides the heat that warm the heart of a marriage.   It heals and brings the couple closer than any other action can.  

For the wife, it is the ultimate act of submission.  He asserts his dominance when he enters her body.   It defines the role of husband and wife.   Even the act of making love, of touching, caressing and kissing brings an intimacy that is impossible to get while you are sitting across the room from each other.

Now add in the more interesting things.  Spanking?  Now dear husband is an abuser?   Whips and chains?  Oh my, you crazy man.   Get away from her.   A knife?   Bondage?  


Really people?

We do the things we do because it feels good.   That flogger feels like a gentile leather rain.   Nothing happens unless we BOTH consent.   There are safe words to let each other know in a single syllable what is going on mentall .   No mind reading going on.  

We talk about the things we do with other people to stay safe.   Some of the things we do are not safe to do without the knowledge that others have.   Suspension and Bondage for example.   Someone can really get hurt if it is done wrong.   We are open and honest with each other when we meet in groups.   We talk about kinky things and sex.   We meet to share knowledge.  

One dominant will show another how to use a flogger or introduce a submissive to the Violet Wand.   There may be a fire play demo or knife work.   Branding and maybe even a single tail whip.   So many yummy things.  

Is is un-christian?   I don't think so.   Sex and love making takes place within the confines of marriage.  Play and learning among friends.  

You have to learn this stuff somewhere!

I think that if people would loosen up and enjoy sex the divorce rates would be much lower.   You learn something new from a friend and want to try it out.  Suddenly that cold bed gets a lot warmer.  

Try something new.  Add a few sprinkles to your boring old vanilla marriage.   It is as simple as buying a scarf to learn bondage or discover the joys of a blindfold.   Bring a glass of ice water to the bedroom and discover what a chilling effect it has when you dip your fingers in it before you caress her.  

Relax,  communicate and ask lots of questions.

Sex and kink are not dirty.  Open up your mind and find out what you are missing!


  1. I've always said that whatever two consenting adults agree to is their business...what I may enjoy, they may not and what they may enjoy, I may not. Doesn't make either one of us wrong...just different. ;)


    1. Exactly! To each his own. What I do isn't dirty or deviant. It is what it is.

  2. Really? I had to sit through sex ed classes at my church. Also we talked about sex being reserved for marriage for most of my Sunday School career. Unless you mean kinky sex, and no there wasn't much mention of that. :)

    1. The only church I have been to that basically taught sex ed was Calvary Chapel. As soon as I found out, we stopped going. What they were teaching was inappropriate for the age group. In southern Baptist churches the topic is taboo.

  3. Church attendance is pretty low in the UK compared to US, there is very little Christian influence in the teaching of sex education. However, that doesn't mean there is not opinions about what constitutes 'normal' sex. Generally Brits are very tolerant about what goes on in the privacy of the home, as long as it isn't touching on the obvious like kids etc. We just don't talk about sex openly in any capacity. From my perspective kink has brought back so much to our sex life and marriage, how could I criticize anyone else.

  4. Dragons Rose, I agree with you 100%. I'll go even one step further. All religions, put some sort of restrictions on love making. Take for instance the Catholic church, were priests, and nuns must remain sexually pure. I wonder how many of this clergy masterbate in private. They all preach love one another. And do just the opposite. I am a firm believer in Darwin's theory of evolution. In my opinion all religions are out of date.

  5. I've never directly experience the sex is a dirty word to Christians thing. My grandparents didn't talk about sex, it was private, my mother never said anything negative about sex, my father either, all of them had sex lives, and they never talked about sex at church, positive or negative. So I wasn't raised with any kind of anti-sex attitude from those around me. It was live and let live, what people do in the privacy of their bedroom was their business.

    Since the act of sexual consummation has always defined marriage (until the current redefining happening right now), it's kind of difficult for sex to be considered dirty when marriage has always been encouraged.

  6. One of the main things I enjoy about Blogland is that you can talk about things you are unable to discuss with your vanilla friends. Whilst there are many things that don't exactly "float my boat", I try to be open and am always interested in listening to others. I do have certain fascinations and am able to email friends here to find out more about them. Then I am able to make up my own mind.

    I've never been to a church where sex was discussed, and am not sure whether I would wish to do so. I suppose it is something that is precious between my husband and myself, and I wouldn't want to discuss it with any 'outsiders' to have them condemn us for what brings us pleasure, and I would certainly never wish to criticise others for what they do to bring themselves pleasure.