Wednesday, April 30, 2014

The Allergist

It is official.  I am allergic to almost everything. The ddoctor put me on several new drugs and is putting in a referral for another drug that needs approval.   She wants to do the allergy shots twice a week too.  

Fun fun.

Very happy I didn't have a tiger striped back.   I am sore enough as it is.

No Flogging tonight.   Not feeling very sexy after today.   Time to take my new meds and go to bed.

Tuesday, April 29, 2014


I want a good Flogging so much but it won't happen tonight.   The ruff sex last night was great but it just wasn't what I wanted.  

You see, I have an appointment for allergy testing tomorrow.   My back will be very itchy before we finish.   I really don't want to explain tiger stripes to the nurse or doctor.  

Very bad idea.  

4 days so far without antihistamines.   I am wheezing, itchy and miserable.   My eyes itch. So does my throat and both of my ears.   My ankles and hands itch from working in the yard.  Probably not the best idea but it needed to be done.  

I think Dragon will be more than willing to give me a nice long reward scene after the appointment.   That and a box of Sees candy.  

I think I'll seduce Dragon again tonight.   More ruff sex should help.   Temporarily.  

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Happy Easter

A little food for thought.

Mary had a little lamb
His fleece was white as snow.

And every where that Mary went,
He was sure to go.

He made His way to Calvary,
to pray for all our sins.

And three days later, conquered death
And rose to life again.

Mary had a little Lamb
His fleece was white as snow

He followed her to school one day
Which was against the rules

It made the children laugh and play
To see a Lamb in school.

And so the teacher turned him out
But still he lingered near.

He waited patiently about
Until Mary did appear

Why does the Lamb love Mary so
The eager children cry

Why Mary loves the Lamb you know
The teacher did reply.

Think about that today.

Hope you have a very blessed Resurrection Day!

Saturday, April 19, 2014


I was going to make an extra effortttonight and wear makeup.   Not much.   Just eye liner, mascara and lip gloss.  


I am already in tears.

I am so proud. My three youngest kids are entering the church.   Three sacraments.   Baptism, First Communion and Confirmation.  


They are all dressed so nice.   They look fantastic.   I am a ball of nerves.   We were told to eat before going but I don't think I can.   A three hour service that starts after sunset and sunrise service in the morning.   We will all need a break after this.

Did you know that Easter is not a federal holiday?   When the holidays were first set, Sunday was considered a holiday.   Now it is just another day.   I think I am going to work to change that.  

Yes,  Dragon has to work.   Poor Dragon.   It is his favorite holiday.   He rather work Christmas than Easter.   Prayers for my Dragon please.  His PTSD is very bad.   He is triggered hard.

Friday, April 18, 2014

Going to the Dogs

Well, I did it.

Our local pound was over crowded once agai .   They were warning the public that they were about to begin euthanizing animals.   They had to make room.

We went to see if any of these doomed puppies would work.   In the first row of kennels I saw her.   A wiggle butt that looked a bit like a greyhound.   Smiling face.   Things and a bit to short.   I moved on but came back to her.   The third time I knelt by her cage, the volunteer asked if I wanted to meet her.

I did and she was so sweet.   Boundless energ. Bouncing but ststill oobedient.   Even as a stray sitting in the pool, she sat for the toy.

I was impressed.

As hard as it is for me to leave the pound without taking ALL the puppies home, I had to think on it.

We went skating.   Even I laced up my scates for some think therapy.   By the third lap I was ready to go get her.

She is home.

A mutt.  Not the pedigree dog I usually train.   No selective breeding.   A few inches to short.  She isn't even a puppy. A bit mal nourished but she will get there.   She starts obedience training this week.   I still need to get her a few things.  A halty and a backpack that fits her.   But it will happen.  One step at a time.

She is one lucky dog.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Bad Dreams

Sometimes our dreams reflect our day and even our guilt.   That is what happened to Dragon last night.  

He dreamed that I divorced him.  


Lack of affection.   A hug and a kiss.   A simple touch and a cuddle on the couch.  

He realized that he had withdrawn from me and his dreams held him accountable.  

I had just started to notice that something was wrong.   I was braced for it to get worse.   The way it was before I started my blog, when PTSD ruled our lives and kept me walking on egg shells.  


He recognized it and stopped before it got bad. I am sure that this is going to be a struggle for a while.  But...  Since he recognizes the problem, we will be able to work through it.  


Sunday, April 13, 2014

Safe Word Training

Oh carp!

Dragon gave me two chances to use a safe word today and I refused.  He pushed hard and I didn't do it.  The first time was after church.  He wanted to go into the city to find some gear for one of our sports loving kids.  I hate the city.  The traffic, people, lack of open space.  I was nearly panicked but I refused to safeword.

The second time happened after we were settled in at home.  It was storming so yard work wasn't going to happen.  Instead we worked in the garage. Cleaning and a building project.  Then it was play time. Dragon pushed hard.  He kept reminding me to use my words.  Asked for my color several times.  The flogger flew faster and harder.  Still I refused.

We ran out of time to finish our little scene.  Kids,life,dogs bad weather...  pick one or pick all.  Now it is time for some serious safe word training.  Why didn't I realize what he was doing earlier?  This time he is going to use the paddle.  Yikes.  I haven't been able to take the paddle in months.  I am nervous.

Time to face the music. I'll update later. Time to go!

Saturday, April 12, 2014


This has been a crazy, busy mont .   With the RCIA class, there is something every week.   Today was the adult retreat.   I got to go at the last minute.   Dragon's schedule changed.   Happy me.  Tomorrow is palm Sunday, the last day of lent.   And Holy week begins.

I am exhausted already.  

We finally broke down and got a new lawnmower.   This one isn't fancy.   Just a plain Walmart model.   Starts with one pull.   It isn't fiddly like the expensive craftsman mower.   I never can get that thing to run.   Most of the hay field now slightly resembles a yard.  

Yep.  I over did it today and will probably run myself ragged this week.  

So how is DD going?   Still going strong.   Dragon is on top of his game.   I have to watch my step.   Fortunatly, all of the spankings have been the fun kind but he has decided that he likes kneeling.   Something about that position opens my ears and closes my mouth.

No fun tonight.   Dragon is to worried.   I REALLY did to much today.   Maybe after church tomorrow....

Thursday, April 10, 2014

My reward

Last night, I fixed Dragon's favorite dinner.   I even gave our son a cooking lesson.   Step by step.   I handed ingredients to my son and he added them to the meatloaf.  

I had just checked the temperature of the meat as Dragon walked in the door.   It needed another 20 minutes in the oven.   Just enough time for a reward.  

Dragon lead me to the garage for some fun.   He even gave me a choice.   Paddles or back.   It wasn't hard.   BACK!   He gathered the floggers while I undressed.   He positioned me on my yoga mat with my arms proped on the seat of the couch.  

It was wonderful.   The rain of leather across my back felt like heaven.   I think he used every flogger in our collection and he used them different ways.   I don't know how he does it but he can give one flogger three different sensations.  

The snake was the most memorable.   It usually has a sharp, biting sting.   But the first sensation from it was more like a fist.   Then came the more familiar bite and finally a light sting.  Something I would associate with a switch.  

Very nice.  

I ate my supper with a smile on my face.

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

To wait or not to wait

That is a question I saw on another blog and thought it deserved a post.  

For me, it really depends on why I am being spanked.   For a fun spanking, I'll set up our play space.  Paddles, belt, lotion, toys, yoga mat and anything else that looks fun.  And thenwe wait.  For Dragon to be off and rested.  For the weather to be warm enough.  For adequate privacy...

A stress relief holds a little more worry.   If he saystthat I need tears,  it is going to be hard.   But I can wait and hope he forgets.  

A punishment is completely different.   He tells me that I am going to be punished but there is no privacy.   It doesn't get delayed,  I get a hall pass.   We don't have time before we have to leave for the Symphony.   He gives me a hug and says that enjoying our date is more important.  

I worry to much about punishment for there to be any delay. More than an hour is unreasonable.   Dragon knows this.  

Ps.   A wait of another kind!

My application for a Mastiff has been accepted.   Yeah!   Now to save my pennies.   This does not mean that I am obligated to buy a puppy from this breeder. Only that I am on her waiting list.   I am still looking for a puppy from other sources and other breeds.   Rescue organizations included.   :-)

Now to wait....

Sunday, April 6, 2014

Going to the Dogs

My search for a dog continues.   I learned a lesson with my dane.  Buyer Beware.   Do your research and know what you are getting.  

I discovered a new variety of mastiff.   One without all the health problems of the English mastif .   The American Mastiff.   A friend of mine even knows a breeder.  

Sounds great.


Well,  she wasn't even taking applications for the waiting list.

The dogs sound perfect.   The size of the mastiff, great temperament, intelligent.  . So, I started looking for other breeders in the area.   I even found a few.  


Buyer beware!

There are two so called American Mastiff breeds or should I say mutts?

The friend of a friend breeds American Mastiffs.  This dog would be perfect.   But when I started shopping around for other breeders I found a mess.   The Panja mastiff is also advertised as an American Mastiff but it is something else entirely.   It isn't even a mastiff at all but a pit/rott mutt.   They are bread as guard dogs for drug dealers and fighting dogs.

Not suitable for my needs at all.   I want a giant clown.   A love bug to be my constant companion not a vicious guard dog.

I now have my name on a wait list for one of the beautiful American Mastiffs not the druggy mutt.   I'll have to pay a crap load of money to get one of these beautiful dogs but it is going to be worth it.  

I will continue my search with an open mind but this is a real possibility.

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Fort Hood

I had a post nearly ready but I find it impossible to post.   4 dead 14 injured 20 ambulances,  70 cop cars and a swat team.   The base is locked down.

And my heart is breaking.  This is to close for comfort in more than one way.  

Is it okay to be happy that Dragon isn't active duty anymore?   To feel relief that I don't have to worry?  

But my heart breaks for the soldiers who have to carry on.  For the families and friends of those lost or injured.   My heart breaks for the police and paramedics.   For the doctors and nurses.  

But still I feel relieved.  

Confused and crying tonight and my country moves on.   I wonder if my country is so jaded by violence that this doesn't even remember.  

Prayers please

I may make the post I intended to make tomorrow but I just can't tonight.