Dragon gave me two chances to use a safe word today and I refused. He pushed hard and I didn't do it. The first time was after church. He wanted to go into the city to find some gear for one of our sports loving kids. I hate the city. The traffic, people, lack of open space. I was nearly panicked but I refused to safeword.
The second time happened after we were settled in at home. It was storming so yard work wasn't going to happen. Instead we worked in the garage. Cleaning and a building project. Then it was play time. Dragon pushed hard. He kept reminding me to use my words. Asked for my color several times. The flogger flew faster and harder. Still I refused.
We ran out of time to finish our little scene. Kids,life,dogs bad weather... pick one or pick all. Now it is time for some serious safe word training. Why didn't I realize what he was doing earlier? This time he is going to use the paddle. Yikes. I haven't been able to take the paddle in months. I am nervous.
Time to face the music. I'll update later. Time to go!