Monday, September 28, 2015

Married to a Dragon

Are you ready to laugh at my misfortune?

Are you sure?

Last warning.

Juvenile potty humor ahead.

I hadn't slept in days.  Between the stress of Dragon not being able to work, family drama and Dragon snoring like a wounded buffalo, sleep just wouldn't come.  I finally talked him into wearing his c-pap.  He hates it but I couldn't stand another night of that obnoxious racket.

Of course he fell asleep seconds after his head hit the pillow.  He was STILL snoring!  Even with his machine but I could stand it.  Just a light buzz with the occasional snort.  He was sleeping better but I still couldn't close my eyes without the bad dreams chasing me back to reality.

I finally just gave up.  Exhausted, frustrated and in desperate need of sleep I got up.  I poured a single shot of whiskey into a small glass. The good stuff that I save just for special occasions.  It went down like a nuclear explosion and warmed me up.  Feeling the effects in just seconds, I wobbled back to the bedroom.

When I sat down on the edge of the bed Dragon let out the loudest fart you can imagine.  His eyes popped open with a startled look on his face.


So much for relaxation.  I laughed until it hurt.  Then I laughed some more.  His look of total confusion was priceless.  He had no idea what had woken him up.  Up he pops out of bed and runs for the bathroom.  No time to put on the walking boot. All I heard as he bolted for the bathroom was, 'oh my tummy!'

After listen to an orcha call his pod, Dragon hobbled slowly back to the bedroom.  Yes, I was still laughing.  Any thoughts of sleep were long gone.  When he asked me what was so funny, I had to gasp for breath to deliver the bad news.

Needless to say, we both enjoyed a good belly laugh and he didn't put that fart inducing machine on again.

I guess I am easily entertained.....

So is life....

Friday, September 25, 2015

The Perfect Date Night

Dragon still hasn't gone back to work.  We are making the best of it.  We spent the afternoon at the gun range.  We took turns firing the guns.  When we ran out of ammo we went out to eat.  Hamburgers.  Yummy!  The only thing that could have made it better is a steak dinner.

I need to get some laundry done and shower to get the smell of gun powder off my skin.  The plan is to finish the day in the garage with the paddles.  :-)

Sunday, September 20, 2015


Our garage is our play space.  With teenagers in the house we have to be discreet with our play.  Last November, just before Thanksgiving, I dug our Christmas decorations out of the garage. One box at a time.  Like most women, I propped the boxes on my hip to get a little extra leverage.  I only had one more box to find when I noticed what looked like big mosquito bites on my side.  They were brown recluse bites. I was sick for months.

Dragon has put DM all over the garage. He has bombed it twice and declared it spider free at last.  Tonight was the first time that I have willing gone out there in a long time. We didn't even have a paddle in our play space anymore.

I refused to expose my backside so he paddled me over my jeans.  Shoes on. Fully dressed. Dragon did a very good job as usual. Slow build up. He started with light pats and increased the intensity slowly.  He rocked my world even fully dressed.

It turned out that I was right to be squeamish.  Just as I was starting to really get into our little session, a ninja spider crept across the floor for a sneak attack.  Since I was positioned over the Roman chair, I could watch my feet.  I saw that little creaper just in time to step on it.  I have no idea what kind of spider it was but it is dead now.

I think Dragon may be spanking me over clothes for a while.  HATE HATE HATE SPIDERS

but the spanking was nice.  My backside is nice and sore.

Friday, September 18, 2015

Life Goes On

I have decided that life must be the worst rollercoaster in the world.  Exhilarating highs and stomach dropping lows. Don't forget the bone jarring change of direction.

So is life.

My oldest was attacked a few weeks ago.  It looks like it was an eye opener for her.  She is back in school. Her emotions are all over the place but she is finally taking steps in the right direction.

My son has found a new obsession.  Not sure I am happy about it but... drums.  The house is filled with happy noise. I can find all kinds of fun things to do in the garage to get away from the racket. WEG.

Dragon is not able to work right now.  Somehow he managed to break a bone in his foot. Fun stuff.  We will make it but some of the fun things we like to do may be gone.  Things like music lessons for the kids and college classes for my 18 y/o.  We will look at money and figure out our options.  I have great kids.  They will understand if some activities have to end.  Dragon's health is more important.

We are using his time off to reconnect.  He works so many hours that sometimes we only see each other at night. Love making, talking, cuddles and dd is back.   Dragon is getting some well deserved rest.

Like I said.  Up, down, around and up side down.

This life.

I am making slow progress on my book.  I have decided that I need a voice recorder for the car.  Driving is when I come up with my best ideas.  The book started with two lines. After a 10 hour drive I have the plot mapped out and the first chapter written.

Time for more cuddles with my Dragon.  :-) good night blog land