Friday, October 31, 2014

HOME!!!!

It feels great to be home.  I slept in my own bed last night with my husband right beside me.

My grandmother can talk when she wants to and walk with LOTS of assistance.  She knew me and even recognized my son.  Not bad for a 90 year old Lady who just had  a massive stroke.  She is s feisty one!

Dragon is just WOW! Anything we need to do to take care of her. If she comes home I may be spending a lot of time away from home.

Stress relief spanking tonight!  I have something to look forward to.   Happy me!

PS.  My sister in law had lots of curious questions for me.  Mostly about bdsm.  She is inching her way to TTWD.

I bet they have a collection of floggers next time I see them.

Saturday, October 25, 2014

Soggy

I keep crying.  I don't know what to think.  My grandmother's sister seems set on putting her in a nursing home.  She would hate that.  It is something that has always terrified her.

Now that her health is declining her choices go away?

She isn't herself.  So frail and helpless.

I am fighting it but I'm not sure what I can do.  i live in Texas. She is in Mississippi.  I can't even talk without crying.  I can't think.

Breath

In

Out

Breath

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Update

Thank you very much for your prayers.  My grandmother is already in rehab.  8 hours of physical therapy a day and if I know her, she is giving it 100%.  Now I can make the drive and not cry the entire way.

It isn't as urgent that I get there now but it is probably better this way.  I'll be safer driving.

When I get back from the trip I'll be mid cycle but we are going to start the temps then.  We are going to order a glass thermometer and see if we get more consistent temps that way.  They are more expensive than digital but if it gives us consistent readings it will be worth it.

Dragon is staying on top of the new rules too.  Exersize eery day and sewing.  It feels good to have some accountability again.

No punishments.  I sm very careful to avoid those.  I am sure that I'll slip eventually but not for a while.  Dragon wouldn't even consider kneeling for the longest time.  Now it happens almost every day.  Safe words always apply so he is happy with that. We both are.

I am not sure how my trip is going to work.  I may have time to play on blog land or none at all.  Fingers crossed that it isn't to stressful.  Packing begins today.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

spinning in circles

My head is spinning.  Just a week ago we were camping at a lake. On our last day there I got a phone call from my brother.  Our grandmother has had another stroke. Because she also had a small bleed they couldn't give her thrombotics.

Our oldest was going to move three states away but changed her mind at the last minute.  Dragon took several days off work to help.  The out of state rush rush rush trip wasn't needed any more but we still had the time off. So we took advantage of it.  After discounts, not counting gas or basic groceries our  mini vacation only set us back $35.  Not bad at all.

It ended with me in tears and wondering how I was going to get to my grandmother across two states.  I wanted to leave right then.  I was ready to hop on the motorcycle and go.  My brother was not thrilled with the idea but it was all I had.

Since he vetoed the bike I asked for help.  My mom offered but the logistics just were not working out.

On to plan C.

Wait until payday and then go.

It has been decided.  I know what day i am leaving and how long Ill have the rental car. My youngest will be my travel partner.  No driving those long miles alone. My brother even found a church for me.  I won't miss mass.

Days latter than I wanted to go but I think it is better this way.  Dragon is still on a hair trigger but more relaxed.  We have a plan in place that all of us can live with.

Please pray for my grandmother.  She is closest thing to a mom my brother ever had.  Pray for healing.  Pray for a safe trip and for the ones I leaving behind to find comfort.  I know Dragon will miss me but I need to go.  I can't explain how it feels but I absolutely know I need to be here.

I started one day relaxed and having fun. Well before lunch I was in tears.

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

More Change

With NFP going again, I should have expected more change.

A NEW  rule.

Exersize every day.  Unless I am obviously sick something is expected.  Fever, vomiting, clogged head.  Those are valid reasons to skip.  If it is just checking the mail that is something.

I may get away with one day but not a week.

And another rule.  Work in the sewing room.  This one is a little more flexible but not much.

I think I should be worried.

Time to get busy.

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

His Hands... again

After a warm bubble bath,  Dragon's magic hands went to work.  His focus was just a small area of my body but he used his hands to great effect.  No demands for sex.  He wanted only to bring me pleasure. A reward for my last post.  We both settled down to sleep but I had other ideas.

In each others arms after all the fireworks, I thought, "wouldn't it be nice to do that with that nasty condom?"

We are going to try once again.  I kept up with NFP for years on my own but I just can't get motivated to do it alone.  He has agreed to take a more active role.  We will see how that works out.

New glass basal thermometer and all the knowledge we already have.  We will start with oral temps but I don't have my hopes up that it will work. My mouth is to dry in the mornings.  Vaginal isn't even uncomfortable and not embarrassing at all when Dragon is using those magic hands.

We will chart on paper and on the phone app to see if the two agree.  I don't trust a program that doesn't have human judgment.  Maybe eventually but not now. I don't wanna baby and I have to be absolutely confident that it is a safe day.

A little work with huge rewards.

Monday, October 13, 2014

Dragon's Hands

What should be simple and easy to write about, isn't. His hands do so much.  They provide for our family, repair broken dolls, make our cars run smooth, they bandage boo boos and pull my hair back out of my face when I am sick.

His hands taught me how to trust and then how to love.  They showed me that all hands are not cruel.  That they can be gentile and loving.

His hands bring me unimaginable pleasure.  There isn't a part of my body immune to his touch.  Under his loving hands I am one big hot spot.  By the time he finally gets around to sex,  have already climaxed several times.  He says that I am all about the foreplay and that is great.  He loves to loves to watch me squirm in pleasure as he brings me to the brink over and over again.

His hands provide stress relief bare bottomed over his lap.  They remind me that I have shelter in the storm.  They give me boundaries and guidance in a world gone crazy.  His hands punish me when I need it the most.

Dragon wanted me to write a post about his hands.  He thought it would be easy.  His hands just provide pleasure during sex.  Right?

No.

It isn't simple at all.  His hands do so much more than just one little job.

Love my Dragon.  Can you tell?

 Fingers crossed that I get to go to bed tonight with a sore bottom.

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

White Noise

With the weather cooling off, the fans go off.  There goes a good nights sleep.  I cannot sleep in silence.

The house was silent.  No dogs barking, the cat wasn't making a fuss, the kids weren't fighting.  But there was a one sound and it made me smile.  It wasn't annoying.  It was soothing.

The sound of Dragon's snores.  I wake him up when it gets really bad because I know he isn't getting good sleep. But honestly, I sleep better when I can hear him sleep.

No more long deployments.

No more 24 hour shifts.

No more travel for pointless classes.

He is home and I can sleep without the comfort of a fan.

One more check mark added to the list of things that make me happy.

Dragon Snores