“You will not punish me for that.”
“That wasn’t hard enough or long enough”
“When are you going to get with the program”
“OWWW that was too hard.”
“Why did you do that. That didn’t feel good.”
“but but but…. I didn’t know that was a rule.”
I asked for ttwd. I complain when he “drops the ball” I complain when he picks up the ball and runs with it. I complain when he doesn’t spank hard enough. I complain when he spanks me the way I thought I should have been spanked last time.
Note to self.
WOMAN, GET WITH THE PROGRAM!
Either you are a submissive wife, willingly incorporating DD into your marriage or you aren’t.
So….. Which is it?
I know I need DD. I can not pull myself out of this hole I have dug my self into. I have tried. I ripped my finger nails off, worked until my hands were a bloody pulp trying to do this on my own. I ASKED FOR THIS. So why is it so hard to submit to him in this?
I am naturally submissive. Always have been. When we met I was overly submissive. I lived in fear. He had to build up self esteem and self worth before I could even lift my face to gaze into his eyes. He taught me how to trust and that love isn’t always a chore. I can go to him with anything. Any concern. Any worry. Any question.
I asked for dd. I asked for his dominance. His control. I need him to be HOH.
Yet I question his judgment when he chooses to punish. I question him when I have clearly broken a rule and he does nothing.
I almost envy the women whose husbands brought DD to the relationship. Almost. I’m not sure I could take the punishment these men dish out.
What do I want? I don’t know…..
If you know, I’m all ears.
“That wasn’t hard enough or long enough”
“When are you going to get with the program”
“OWWW that was too hard.”
“Why did you do that. That didn’t feel good.”
“but but but…. I didn’t know that was a rule.”
I asked for ttwd. I complain when he “drops the ball” I complain when he picks up the ball and runs with it. I complain when he doesn’t spank hard enough. I complain when he spanks me the way I thought I should have been spanked last time.
Note to self.
WOMAN, GET WITH THE PROGRAM!
Either you are a submissive wife, willingly incorporating DD into your marriage or you aren’t.
So….. Which is it?
I know I need DD. I can not pull myself out of this hole I have dug my self into. I have tried. I ripped my finger nails off, worked until my hands were a bloody pulp trying to do this on my own. I ASKED FOR THIS. So why is it so hard to submit to him in this?
I am naturally submissive. Always have been. When we met I was overly submissive. I lived in fear. He had to build up self esteem and self worth before I could even lift my face to gaze into his eyes. He taught me how to trust and that love isn’t always a chore. I can go to him with anything. Any concern. Any worry. Any question.
I asked for dd. I asked for his dominance. His control. I need him to be HOH.
Yet I question his judgment when he chooses to punish. I question him when I have clearly broken a rule and he does nothing.
I almost envy the women whose husbands brought DD to the relationship. Almost. I’m not sure I could take the punishment these men dish out.
What do I want? I don’t know…..
If you know, I’m all ears.
Hey you cheated you read my private journal and posted it right here for all to read, GEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZ what is it with you and Rouge you two need to stay out of my bedroom and out of my journal. LOL Ok so you didn't read my journal but you, you posted exactly what I am feeling. When you find please let me know.
ReplyDeleteAnnie, if you hid it in a better spot, we wouldn't be able to find it. Sorry.
ReplyDeleteLM, I've had the same thoughts about how different he would be if HE had introduced DD.
ReplyDelete@ Annie, according to PK, friends work together to GET one another in trouble, so there you have it. LM and I are a'looking out for ya! :)
U want him to make the decision so u dnt have to, especially when I are fighting. I struggle with too. I want the control, not the pain.
ReplyDeleteAnswer is punishment spanking with feathers.
Kelly
CG that is funny. The newest flogger is named "feather" Just a little sting and a soft thud. No matter how hard he uses it, it doesn't do any damage. Love it.
ReplyDeleteDecisions aren't the problem. I have to make those every day. Control. Him having it and me giving it up. Yep. I think you may be on to something.
having issues with the blogger again. It won't let me sign in for comments. Hmmm.
Missie